Michelle Zauner was born to a Korean woman and an American man, and for much of her early life she tried to hide her Korean side because in Eugene, Oregon, where she lived, there weren't many Korean people. She also writes about her changing dynamic with her mother, from childhood, adolescence, and during her mother's years with cancer.
Her father had a difficult childhood, involving bad parents and drugs. He had managed to break away from the cycle and considered it an achievement that he even had a child, so most of her care was done by her mother.
Her mother was interesting, not a protective or harsh one, somewhere in between. She was all about keeping things orderly. As a child, Zauner always strived to impress her mother, always doing things she asked for or would want in search of praise. But as she grew up, the classic teenage rift appeared. Her mother focused on her grades and college, while Michelle wanted to become an artist. Eventually, it got so bad, that Michelle left the house for a few weeks and refused to go to school, which ultimately ended up in her coming back when she became a literal "starving artist".
After college, she spends a few years in a part-time band and other part-time jobs, visiting her mother every so often. Even though they parted in a rough manner, they are inextricably tied together and their visits are always emotional.
Then comes the calamity that the majority of the book explores. Her mother, who was in great shape, gets cancer. Michelle immediately leaves Philadephia to return to Eugene, where the routine of the past few years is broken. Her mother rapidly declines, and a whole cohort of women try to help her get through. The prospect of her mother dying causes a sort of floodgate to open for Michelle, a new desire to reconnect with her homeland. She tries Korean recipes, visits Korea with her mother for a last time.
In the end, it is a story of family and culture, how the author was tied to it all, no matter how much she tries to escape it.
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